The Perilous Inquirer
Vol. 1, Second Issue
July 12, 2013

THIEVES AUCTION
“On Your Side” and his girl friend “Up Yours” held a Purloined Auction yesterday in the Luna bank. At auction were pairs of scissors, bits of food and a pile of loomable (they swore) navel lint. “It took us weeks to steal all this,” said On Your Side.
Proceeds go to (they swear) to their fund for the widows & orphans of alien abductees.

OVERHEARD
in the Luna Lounge
Dionysis: “Hey! I gotta leak in my new cup!
Camriel: “Go ahead, it’s your cup.”

INTERVIEW Jack Straw
by Kattasrophe (age 12)
Jack Straw, 39, is a pirate and guild member of arrr who likes to PvP and role play.
Jack said that the leader of his guild, Parium, is very good. He also said Captain Sureno was a leader, and a very good one too.
Jack said his father was a bushido warrior, so he decided to become a swash buckler.
Jack spends most of his time drinking rum and thinking of past things he has done. As for things he likes to do it would be pvping, roleplay, t-maps and sailing the land.
Until my next interview with someone, thank you for reading about Jack Straw!
[Editor’s note: Hope you enjoyed this interview Katt died twice getting it.]

POET’S CORNER
The Moose Song
Oh, gorillas are fun on a Saturday night,
And lions and tigers can put up a fight,
But it’s not quite the same when I ram their caboose,
As the feeling I get when I hump on a moose.
– Robbed Roy

The CyBERNAUTS GUIDE
has This to say about Rules
There is only one rule: Anyone who tells you of a rule wants something from you.

HEALTH WARNING
The Ter Mur Surgeon General has determined that the current craze of breast feeding pigeons in the Queen’s Park is hazardous to your health.

FEATURED MALL
I4NI Vendors
53S,164E New Magincia
“Remember folks, at I4NI we cheat the Other guy & pass the savings on to You!”
 – Baby Doll

The Perilous Inquirer
A Meretricious Publication Reporting on Siege Life
Address: 3rd house on left out the Luna south gate
Publisher: The ROFLtimes
Editor: DeadBob
Reporters: Kattasrophe, Otero, Subzero
Reporters Wanted! Submit stories to [email protected]
Lawsuits: Dewey Cheatum & Howe

Many thanks to the supporters of The Perilous Inquirer for their gifts, their time and their encouragement:
Dionysis  Camriel  Nurse Miss Maude  Lord Waynbo  Kage Venator  & the Denizens of Siege Perilous!

~sine die~

Join the discussion at
http://uo2.stratics.com/community/threads/the-perilous-inquirer-second-issue.301839/